2020 Covid Lockdown Reflections

I suppose I’d better get dressed. 

What will I wear today?

Who cares! 

No-one will see me anyway!

My days are so busy, I have a plan

And a list as long as my arm.

I regularly change my activity 

And cross off the things I have done.

But my soul sings out in alarm

Where are my friends?

Where is my voice?

My singing has all but stopped.

I’m still not dressed! 

I’m supposed to be out in the garden.

It’s part of my plan every morning at 8

And it’s 9 already

And the chooks should be let out to scratch.

Yesterday I dressed

In good jeans!

And visited my daughter (for a cuppa)

We sat in the garage (it was raining)

With the door wide open and quilts over knees.

It was my first outing in 10 weeks

Such a joy to get in the car, 

To have a reason to dress, and to meet.

Significant times have been celebrated,

(a birthday, Easter, Anzac Day, Mother’s Day)

All in isolation!

I’m well over 60 you see 

And considered vulnerable at least.

Family came for picnics out back,

Or with doors and windows between us.

No cuddles or kisses from kids or grandkids

And distances kept as dictated.

My life is so full and busy

I haven’t got time to be bored.

How come I feel lonely and empty at times?

Why should I crave anything at all?

Why do the tears just flow?

Why do I cry out to God for a hug?

Nothing more, I’m content, just a hug!

He gives them to me! Ahh thank you.

Zoom and Duo, email, blogs, phones

Are the tools I use to weave

The threads that tie us together,

Into a quilt that keeps my community

From vanishing into thin air.

I’ve made lots of quilts!

I’ve added achievements to blogs

And watched those of others too.

With Netflix, YouTube and audio books 

I spend my evenings through.

Zoom live pilates with my instructor,

Recorded Zoom church on Sunday,

Zoom church morning tea on Wednesdays,

Zoom patchwork group get togethers,

Duo calls with children and grandchildren,

All keep me together.

I’ve found some inspiring creations online

Two poems* that express

The feelings I have about lockdown, 

To help me reflect and laugh.

I’m a glass half full kind of person

And am happy to be given the time

To do all those things I’ve needed to do.

I've sorted the garden, the chooks, 

The files, the photos, the fabric, the rooms.

And created all sorts of things.

I’ve made lots of quilts!

I am grateful to those who are carers.

I grieve for those who are sick or have died.

I pray for those who have traumas to bear

And are unable to find their peace.

But it’s up to us to be happy or sad,

To immerse ourselves in joy or grief,

In the world we find ourselves

To care, to mourn, then to laugh.

This is not the way I planned it

But God has plans of his own.

To use my God-given talents for good

Is the only way I know. 

So forward I go - to get dressed -

Looking ever onward with joy

To the days ahead, 

To the day I can sing again,

To the hugs from my circle

Of family and friends,

And to a future wherever I’m needed

That is happy and full of joy,

Looking for the positive outcome

In the terrors of the unknown.

They call this “The New Normal”.

We plan, look for new paths to take.

Then make more plans, 

embrace our community, 

Recalibrate.

Until we come out the other end

Stay safe, stay sane.

Written by Betty Jacobs, 19 May 2020 after 10 weeks of Covid-19 Lockdown.
Published in "Vision", Winter Issue 2020, the quarterly magazine of St Stephens Church,
Macquarie St, Sydney

* Readings for inspiration
"In the time of Pandemic" - by Kitty O'Meara on her blog "The Daily Round" on 16 March 2020.
"Stuck Inside" - attributed to Jan Beaumont and found on the "Starts at 60" website.
Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in the mind of a man,
but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand."